Hallows Eve Humor
October 31 ushers in All Saints Day and the day of the dead which falls on November 1&2. Trick or treats are held in neighborhoods and offices with parents and kids in tow who are dressed in hideous and scary costumes to harvest bags of candies. Kids and their dentists look forward to this occasion.
Hersheys, Kisses and Reeses are top choices. Discrimination is not limited to people it also applies to chocolates. Unbranded chocolate eggs wrapped in tin foil will definitely spend a year in the refrigerator.
Parents with money to spare proudly buy pricey eerie costumes that makes heads turn, elicit wows and envy. Other parents surviving on shoe string budgets make do with black colored dress and mom's cheap face powder and lipstick.
Zombies and vampires are favorites, but parents put on sloppy make-up on their children. Pre-schoolers can do a better job.
The moms on budget, hope against hope and believe that their little ones will win the first prize pitted against kids with expensive and outlandish costumes. Saints who have done impossible miracles will give up on this one.
With eyes wide, parents instruct their little ones to win or else. It's serious business for them. They transform into scary monsters with huge eyes, prodding and at the same time scaring their children to win.
November 1, traditionally, is the day to remember our dead family members and a chance for everyone to troop to the cemetery. It is also the day to check who is still around. It's like a classroom roll call where hands are raised or not.
For memorial plot type of cemeteries, it will answer the nagging question on who will be the new next door neighbor.
Filipino families back in the day were usually big, reaching to more than 10 siblings. Sibling rivalry and competition is normal for a big family. But on November 1 no wants to be first.
Each year at the back of each of their minds they'll ask who would be following their dead parents. All eyes are usually focused on the black sheep who usually drinks, smoke and is probably a "meth" head. The siblings would always say that he's always in heaven.
Always stoned, the blacksheep is the luckiest among the siblings. He'll never grow old coz' he'll die young."
Ever noticed that graveyards nowadays reflect the trends in real estate in major cities. It is going vertical and compact. Today you can choose where you want to rest from apartments to plush columbarium ten storey high. But unfortunately you won't get to enjoy the view if you're at the penthouse.
For mausoleums, in old parochial cemeteries you can notice every year new improvements by owners on their mausoleums. Improvements stop when the project lead's tombstone is already included among the tombstones.
Did you also notice that on All Saint's Day, the motorists are angels. Since there is no traffic in the city on that day they are not possessed by road rage.
Motorists are all happy and calm enjoying paradise here on earth while driving. Wait till you see the resumption of work day, they all transform into raving maniacal drivers. Gridlock traffic seems to trigger the rage virus. Traffic might help increase the priesthood vocation specializing in exorcism.
A cousin of mine asked why is sticky rice (biko) usually served during the day of the dead? I answered "that's for dessert if you plan to serve bulalo."
Hersheys, Kisses and Reeses are top choices. Discrimination is not limited to people it also applies to chocolates. Unbranded chocolate eggs wrapped in tin foil will definitely spend a year in the refrigerator.
Parents with money to spare proudly buy pricey eerie costumes that makes heads turn, elicit wows and envy. Other parents surviving on shoe string budgets make do with black colored dress and mom's cheap face powder and lipstick.
Zombies and vampires are favorites, but parents put on sloppy make-up on their children. Pre-schoolers can do a better job.
The moms on budget, hope against hope and believe that their little ones will win the first prize pitted against kids with expensive and outlandish costumes. Saints who have done impossible miracles will give up on this one.
With eyes wide, parents instruct their little ones to win or else. It's serious business for them. They transform into scary monsters with huge eyes, prodding and at the same time scaring their children to win.
November 1, traditionally, is the day to remember our dead family members and a chance for everyone to troop to the cemetery. It is also the day to check who is still around. It's like a classroom roll call where hands are raised or not.
For memorial plot type of cemeteries, it will answer the nagging question on who will be the new next door neighbor.
Filipino families back in the day were usually big, reaching to more than 10 siblings. Sibling rivalry and competition is normal for a big family. But on November 1 no wants to be first.
Each year at the back of each of their minds they'll ask who would be following their dead parents. All eyes are usually focused on the black sheep who usually drinks, smoke and is probably a "meth" head. The siblings would always say that he's always in heaven.
Always stoned, the blacksheep is the luckiest among the siblings. He'll never grow old coz' he'll die young."
Ever noticed that graveyards nowadays reflect the trends in real estate in major cities. It is going vertical and compact. Today you can choose where you want to rest from apartments to plush columbarium ten storey high. But unfortunately you won't get to enjoy the view if you're at the penthouse.
For mausoleums, in old parochial cemeteries you can notice every year new improvements by owners on their mausoleums. Improvements stop when the project lead's tombstone is already included among the tombstones.
Did you also notice that on All Saint's Day, the motorists are angels. Since there is no traffic in the city on that day they are not possessed by road rage.
Motorists are all happy and calm enjoying paradise here on earth while driving. Wait till you see the resumption of work day, they all transform into raving maniacal drivers. Gridlock traffic seems to trigger the rage virus. Traffic might help increase the priesthood vocation specializing in exorcism.
A cousin of mine asked why is sticky rice (biko) usually served during the day of the dead? I answered "that's for dessert if you plan to serve bulalo."
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